SOME FEATURES OF YOUNG ADULTS

These features of young adults are to be considered along with the Risk factors page

• Impulsivity
• Previous suicidal behaviour
• Prone to handle bad feelings with alcohol, cannabis and other drugs
• Likely to know another who has done it
• May be part of risk taking behaviour or self-harm or exhibit multiple “accident prone” incidents
• Being bullied (e.g. at workplace or university)
• A sense of failure at training place or university
• A sense of failure in relationships
• Experience of discrimination, isolation and relationship conflicts with family, friends and others because of sexuality
• Lack of care about clothes and appearance, sudden change in weight
• Changes in emotions and behaviour (depression, anxiety, severe anger, aggressiveness)
• Withdrawal from friends and social activities
• Change in social values and pessimism in society
• Homelessness

 What Young Adults With Suicidal Thoughts Tell Us About Their Situation

1.They have a sense of having no control over things happening in their lives.

2.They feel under pressure.

3.There has been a break-up of important relationships.

4.They want to escape from depression.

The suicide attempt may signal not so much a wish to die as a wish for the hurting to stop. 

Some Reasons For Attempting Suicide

Some reasons given by young people for attempting suicide are indicated as follows in descending order1                    

1. The situation was so unbearable that I had to do something and I didn’t know what else to do.

2. I wanted to stop feeling the pain.          

Useful Contacts For Young Adults

Why Are Others Not Able To Comfort Me?

Every person grieves differently and these differences may lead to tensions and misunderstandings within a family or a community. 

It may even be that you or other family members begin to feel suicidal. Many people feel this way when something terrible happens in their life.  It is important though that help is found. Speak with your doctor or ring a support agency such as Lifeline (ph: 13 11 14) to find the right help for you. You will find some numbers to contact in the back of this book. 

Young people in particular stand to benefit from the inclusion of their peers in the grieving process of the family.

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THINKING ABOUT SUICIDE?  STRATEGIES TO STAY ALIVE

Strategies to help the person with the thoughts

Recognise the suicide thoughts and outsmart them

• Suicide thoughts come in waves.  The thoughts will reach a peak and then subside – usually over a few hours.
• Often the thoughts peak at night when you are alone.
• The thoughts discourage you from speaking to others about them.
• They isolate you.
• They try and trick you into the idea that there is no future.
• Worst of all, they try and trick you into the idea that the family would be better off without you.  This is never the case.

Things to do to beat the thoughts and stay alive

• When you feel them coming on, be with other people.  People rarely suicide in company.
• Break the silence and talk to someone.
• If on your own, ring a friend, family member or counselling service.
• Avoid alcohol and illegal drugs.  These will often feed negative thoughts that can make you feel sad or bad.
• Remove anything from the house that could be dangerous to you.

The depression will pass

• Sooner or later you will get out of this hole.
• You may wonder how these thoughts ever got such a strong grip on you.

Getting stronger

• Over time, with help, you will get back your old strength.
• This increased strength will make it less likely that the negative thoughts will have the same impact again.
• But it takes time.  Give yourself time to work on turning things around.

Adapted from the Toughin’ It Out.  Strategies For Dealing With Suicidal Thoughts pamphlet, developed by Simon Bridge.

This document is downloadable at - http://www.suicidepreventionfnq.org.au/fnq/index.php/resources

Useful contacts

• Beyond Blue   www.beyondblue.org.au
• Kids Help Line www.kidshelp.com.au Phone: 1800 55 1800 (24 hours)
• Lifeline Phone: 13 11 14 (24 hours)

• Men’s Helpline  www.mensline.org.au Phone: 1300 78 99 78 (24 hours)
• Salvo Care Line Phone: 1300 36 36 22 (24 hours in Qld, NSW and ACT)
• Suicide Callback Service (and online counselling) www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au  Phone: 1300 659 467 (24 hours)

• Veterans and Veterans Families Counselling Service http://www.dva.gov.au/health_and_wellbeing/health_programs/vvcs/pages/index.aspx       Phone: 1800 011 046 (24 hours)
• See insert at back of book for other counselling services

Talking To Others About The Suicide

You may want to talk to others about the suicide but don’t know how they will react! What do you tell them?

In getting the support of others you will need to decide who and what to tell of the suicide.  How you view suicide yourself will affect what you say and who you tell. You may be afraid that others will judge you harshly. Society still attaches a stigma to suicide as it is largely not understood. A survivor may encounter blame, judgment or exclusion as a result.

You may feel shame, guilt or responsibility for the death – for what you did or did not do for the person who has died.  You may feel anger at the dead person and guilt about this.  However it is important to realise these are natural reactions.  Many emotions will be felt at different times.  This is a normal response to loss and is part of the grieving process.

Some will want to convince the survivors that it was not suicide.  Others will want to avoid talking about the person, as if they had not existed, or to “jolly” them out of their grief.  This is perhaps to do with their own discomfort with witnessing distress or avoidance of their own disturbing feelings associated with the loss.

It may help if you mentally prepare a few answers for questions people may ask. For example, if someone is probing you for details of the suicide and you are not feeling up to discussing them, you might simply say “I don’t really want to talk about it right now, can we talk about something else?” When someone you meet asks “How did he/she die?” a simple response may be “He/she took his/her own life”.

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